The Huffington Post is talking about pregnancy, post-miscarriage. This gets to the heart of a lot of how the miscarriage has made me view the idea of future pregnancies. I want them, I just don't trust my body to handle them.
Know that I constantly think and pray for both of you. Thanks for sharing this article, I believe a part of what makes these struggles so hard is that there is such a taboo around them. People just don't talk about these things (not blaming anyone, I know it is hard). So while you are going through this and all you see is pregnancy / birth announcements, you start wondering why you are the only ones. Then you start looking around and it happens to other couples. I really hope this will be over for you guys very soon. I am slowly coming to a place where I realize that this is all about letting go of all control (which is extremely hard) and just accepting each day that comes... and staying positive that though it might be a harder road, it does not mean it won't happen.
These parts resonated the most... knowing that the things I dreamed are not going to happen in the way we always thought. That loss of innocence is what hurts the most... and in our case, not knowing the cause :
"The confidence, innocence and bliss that other women experience will never be our story."
"Pregnancy losses or difficulty conceiving often lead women to mistrust their body, and view it as defective. "
The line about mistrusting bodies really struck me as well. It was the line that pushed me from just reading the article to sharing it.
I do think it's so important that this taboo somehow gets broken. Because miscarriage and fertility issues do have such a large effect on the people experiencing them it blows my mind that it's supposed to be off the table for discussion. Hence why I keep talking about it.
That was so totally true for me. Until I saw the baby at the 13 week ultrasound, I didn't really believe it was real. And I kept expecting something to go wrong. Until I hit about 27 weeks - the time when things are probably viable, I held my breath. It was stressful.
And Jess was born TOTALLY FINE.
But that doesn't negate 36 weeks of holding my breath.
I'm sorry that your miscarriage affected your pregnancy with Jess. :( Having a healthy, happy child in the end is (obviously) the end goal and point of it all, but you're entirely right that it doesn't negate holding your breath for 36 weeks.
I'm pretty certain I'll be feeling pretty apprehensive and nervous if I do get another shot at pregnancy. I think one of the things that makes me angriest about the miscarriage is the way it's really made me feel scared of being pregnant in a way that I never had before.
Hello Sheryl... I just had this Liebster blog thing, and I nominated you. Here it is. http://poppiesandicecream.blogspot.nl/2012/11/thankfulness-and-liebster-blog-award.html
Know that I constantly think and pray for both of you. Thanks for sharing this article, I believe a part of what makes these struggles so hard is that there is such a taboo around them. People just don't talk about these things (not blaming anyone, I know it is hard). So while you are going through this and all you see is pregnancy / birth announcements, you start wondering why you are the only ones. Then you start looking around and it happens to other couples.
ReplyDeleteI really hope this will be over for you guys very soon.
I am slowly coming to a place where I realize that this is all about letting go of all control (which is extremely hard) and just accepting each day that comes... and staying positive that though it might be a harder road, it does not mean it won't happen.
These parts resonated the most... knowing that the things I dreamed are not going to happen in the way we always thought. That loss of innocence is what hurts the most... and in our case, not knowing the cause :
"The confidence, innocence and bliss that other women experience will never be our story."
"Pregnancy losses or difficulty conceiving often lead women to mistrust their body, and view it as defective. "
The line about mistrusting bodies really struck me as well. It was the line that pushed me from just reading the article to sharing it.
DeleteI do think it's so important that this taboo somehow gets broken. Because miscarriage and fertility issues do have such a large effect on the people experiencing them it blows my mind that it's supposed to be off the table for discussion. Hence why I keep talking about it.
That was so totally true for me. Until I saw the baby at the 13 week ultrasound, I didn't really believe it was real. And I kept expecting something to go wrong. Until I hit about 27 weeks - the time when things are probably viable, I held my breath. It was stressful.
ReplyDeleteAnd Jess was born TOTALLY FINE.
But that doesn't negate 36 weeks of holding my breath.
I'm sorry that your miscarriage affected your pregnancy with Jess. :( Having a healthy, happy child in the end is (obviously) the end goal and point of it all, but you're entirely right that it doesn't negate holding your breath for 36 weeks.
DeleteI'm pretty certain I'll be feeling pretty apprehensive and nervous if I do get another shot at pregnancy. I think one of the things that makes me angriest about the miscarriage is the way it's really made me feel scared of being pregnant in a way that I never had before.
Hello Sheryl... I just had this Liebster blog thing, and I nominated you. Here it is. http://poppiesandicecream.blogspot.nl/2012/11/thankfulness-and-liebster-blog-award.html
ReplyDeleteThank you Amanda! That is super sweet of you. I guess I've got myself some writing to do! :D
Delete